The Swass Report Needs its own Flag.
That way I could fly it at 3/4 mast until Manute Bol recovers from a horrific car accident. Now why do I care so much about a basketball player that only averaged 2.6 points a game (besides the fact that he blocked more shots per minute than anyone in league history)? Because he is a fellow Dinka tribesman of my good friend Randy, or Minute Bol as he was known back in Sudan. Randy is simply the American name given to him after his exile from the Dinka tribe. You see, Randy turned out to be too short and too white for the rest of the tribe's liking. Hence the name Minute. He was also known as "The Little Ritz" by schoolmates, which in Dinka means "Tiny Cracker". The tribe elders voted him out when he was but five years old, and put him in a rickety wooden raft which found it's way to the shores of the USA. While the Dinkas were rough on the outcast runt of the tribe, Manute was always good to him. And therefore, I will be good to Manute and wish him a speedy recovery. As for the rest of the Dinkas, if they say anything bad about my reject friend, I will headbutt them in the kneecap.
Manute let Minute play ball with him at the first ever distant relative all-star game.