Ben Affleck Proves He's Not a Complete Donkey
(May still be zombie though.)
Apparently one can prove oneself not to be a complete donkey by winning the California State Poker Championship. Also competeing was Tobey Maguire, who is apparently a "sweater" and has yet to prove himself not to be a complete donkey. Ben thanked Gabe Kaplan for his tutorage. I've seen alot of Welcome Back Kotter, and I don't remember him ever teaching the Sweathogs how to play poker. Why, Mr. Kotter? Who needs to learn history, when you could be making millions playing cards.
I liked him better as a zombie.