Viva Las Vegas!
Due to stringent "Stays in Vegas" laws. I am not allowed to speak about most of this past weekend. Even if I wanted to I couldn't. As you leave the town, they erase your memory. Why else do you think people go back after losing exorbanant amounts of money? What I can tell you is that The Munsters are my new best friends. You just can't lose on their nickel slot game. That is the only memory they let me keep. That and the cold, unwavering stare of Captain Picard. Wait, I remember one more thing. It's good to be the King, or at least act like him. When I was in the lobby at the MGM Grand one fine evening/morning?, I saw three Elvis impersonaters surrounded by a herd of girls. So apparently all you have to do to meet girls is go to Vegas in your best Elvis costume and hang out in hotel lobbies. I suggest you try this technique at least once in your life.
These guys are money, baby.